After repeating that rededication statement, .. I started to remind myself why Jesus means so much to me.. As I was thinking about that.. the lyrics of this hymn float back to my mind…

Title: Lily of The Valley
Lyrics: Charles W Fry
Music: William S Hays

I have found a friend in Jesus, He’s everything to me,
He’s the fairest of ten thousand to my soul;
The Lily of the Valley, in Him alone I see
All I need to cleanse and make me fully whole.
In sorrow He’s my comfort, in trouble He’s my stay;
He tells me every care on Him to roll.

Refrain:
He’s the Lily of the Valley, the Bright and Morning Star,
He’s the fairest of ten thousand to my soul.

He all my grief has taken, and all my sorrows borne;
In temptation He’s my strong and mighty tower;
I have all for Him forsaken, and all my idols torn
From my heart and now He keeps me by His power.
Though all the world forsake me, and Satan tempt me sore,
Through Jesus I shall safely reach the goal.

(Refrain)

He will never, never leave me, nor yet forsake me here,
While I live by faith and do His blessèd will;
A wall of fire about me, I’ve nothing now to fear,
From His manna He my hungry soul shall fill.
Then sweeping up to glory to see His blessèd face,
Where the rivers of delight shall ever roll.

(Refrain)

Today, marks the first Sabbath of my trial. Actually, the pain is getting worst and worst
Once when I was crying to God in my prayer.. and I asked God whether he knows that
I am feeling so weak.. that I do not know how I should be handling the situation around
me…

I know that God was watching for me, and he had heard my prayers… and he is the
one that holds my tomorrow… But now… all I need is a comfort for God… and all I want
to tell God … that, I would love him.. and if his will… is for me to go through my Gethsemane,
and to walk through the valley of the shadow of death. I would just want a clear indication
from him… one word from him and I will enter the valley… I just do not wish to step into
the valley without Gods authorisation (yea.. its a weird feeling.. why would one wants to
go into suffering? .. But really… I know that even if I walk through that valley… Gods staff
and his rod would comfort me.. As long as its Gods will, I would w

I wonder, whether God can see us crying while we are praying… That is when God just
answer me.. for those tears I died” .. as a comfort. This hymn is inspired from Psalm 56.
Written by David, when the Philistines captured him in Gath.

Psalm 56:
Be merciful to me, O God, for man would swallow me up;
Fighting all day he oppresses me.
My enemies would hound me all day,
For there are many who fight against me, O Most High.

Whenever I am afraid,
I will trust in You.
In God (I will praise His word),
In God I have put my trust;
I will not fear.
What can flesh do to me?

All day they twist my words;
All their thoughts are against me for evil.
They gather together,
They hide, they mark my steps,
When they lie in wait for my life.
Shall they escape by iniquity?
In anger cast down the peoples, O God!

You number my wanderings;
Put my tears into Your bottle;
Are they not in Your book?
When I cry out to You,
Then my enemies will turn back;
This I know, because God is for me.
In God (I will praise His word),
In the LORD (I will praise His word),
In God I have put my trust;
I will not be afraid.
What can man do to me?

Vows made to You are binding upon me, O God;
I will render praises to You,
For You have delivered my soul from death.
Have You not kept my feet from falling,
That I may walk before God
In the light of the living?

I really wonder how David feels like when he is surrounded… I really wandered how similar is my feeling to his.
But to me, its a big comfort that God has numbered my wanderings and put my tears in his bottle. Recorded them
one by one.

The term, “For those tears I died” that God was comforting me, came from this hymn that Marsha Stevens has written,
I learnt that during one of the camps last year.

Title: For Those Tears I Died
Music, Lyrics: Marsha Stevens

You said you’d come and share all my sorrows
You said you’d be there for all my tomorrows
I came so close to sending you away
And just like you promised, you came there to stay
I just had to pray.

(Chorus)
And Jesus said, Come to the water, stand by my side,
I know you are thirsty, you won’t be denied.
I felt every teardrop when in darkness you cried,
And I strove to remind you that for those tears I died.

Repeat Chorus

Your goodness so great I can’t understand,
And, dear Lord, I know that this was all planned.
Saviour, you’re here now, and always will be.
Your love is so great and always so free, Jesus and me.

Repeat Chorus

Jesus, I give you my heart and my soul.
I know, without God I’d never be whole,
Saviour, you opened up all the right doors,
And I thank you and praise you from earth’s humble shores.
Take me, I’m yours.

Repeat Chorus

Yesterday night I was singing this hymn with a group of friends.
For most of my friends who had been reading my last few blog
entries. I guess you would know that I am in the deepest, and
darkest hour of my life.. And I really do not know how I could
survive.

Waiting is indeed tough, sometimes I just wish God give me my
verdict now.. so that my mind could be put at ease.. and the
stress dissappears. And it is at times like this I realised that, if
you are very distressed.. Praying and making petition before
God for hours seems easier than when the times are beautiful
and fine..

God did not say much, except to remind me that , I am not facing
that alone.. No matter how dark the stituation is, or how this
battle looks like a lost clause. Thou Thinkest Lord of me.

But sometimes I am frustrated with my ice-cream faith… Perhaps
my faith is hard and strong when u take it out from the freezer. But
over time, when the heat from the world starts to heat it up… The
Ice-cream looks like a cup of milk now… No longer hard, no longer
strong.

Sometimes I wonder, if God has really forsaken, and forgotten me.
Despite all the time God assured me that he knows how I am feeling.
Why then he keep quiet? Why then he does not want to help me anymore?
Even if his will is for me to do something else, why dont he just tell me?

At this time, a few verses came at the back of my mind… a reminder from God
” For He knows our frame; He remembers that we are dust. ” (Ps. 103:14)
“Fear not, for I am with you; Be not dismayed, for I am your God. I will
strengthen you, Yes, I will help you, I will uphold you with My righteous
right hand.” (Isaiah 41:10)

But Zion said, “The LORD has forsaken me,
And my Lord has forgotten me.”
” Can a woman forget her nursing child,
And not have compassion on the son of her womb?
Surely they may forget,
Yet I will not forget you.
See, I have inscribed you on the palms of My hands;
Your walls are continually before Me.” (Is 49:14-16)

I know as a matter of fact. The guy that forgotten God
is really me.. and I know God will be faithful. Even if
we are faithless. Just like what Paul told Timothy in
(2 Tim 2:11-13)

This is a faithful saying:
For if we died with Him,
We shall also live with Him.
If we endure,
We shall also reign with Him.
If we deny Him,
He also will deny us.
If we are faithless,
He remains faithful;
He cannot deny Himself.

Now with these verses at the back of our mind.. lets
think about this hymns that I have posted here.

Title: Thou Thinkest, Lord, Of Me
Words and Music by E.S. Lorenz and E.D. Mund

Amid the trials that I meet,
Amid the thorns that pierce my feet,
One thought remains supremely sweet:
Thou thinkest, Lord, of me!

Thou thinkest, Lord, of me!
Thou thinkest, Lord, of me!
What need I fear when Thou art near,
And thinkest, Lord, of me!

The cares of life come thronging fast,
Upon my soul their shadows cast;
Their gloom reminds my heart at last –
Thou thinkest, Lord, of me!

Thou thinkest, Lord, of me!
Thou thinkest, Lord, of me!
What need I fear when Thou art near,
And thinkest, Lord, of me!

Let shadows come, let shadows go,
Let life be bright, or dark with woe,
I am content, for this I know –
Thou thinkest, Lord, of me!

Thou thinkest, Lord, of me!
Thou thinkest, Lord, of me!
What need I fear when Thou art near,
And thinkest, Lord, of me!

Website with “Thou thinkest, Lord, Of Me”

Unfortunately, I cant find any guys on youtube
that plays this hymn… But i found a website
that sells the midi files of this hymn.. Hence
you can open the site, and hear the hymn.

I be glad if theres anyone willing to play this
hymn on youtube.. Please let me know if you
found any.

This is a hymn that was inspired from the Battle of Allatoona in the American Civil War.
In that battle, the Union Garrison led by General John M Corse was attacked by Confederate
General Samuel G French. The reason for the attack is to cut the union supply lines.
The battle started with 2 hours of artillery barrage and a demand for surrender. The confederates started to attack the 2 redoubts defended by the Union forces. The redoubts are placed to protect the railroad between them.

For 2 Hours, the Union forces are pin down in the redoubt, and suffered heavy casualties. General Corse lost 1/3 of his men and he himself was wounded. He lost a cheek bone and a ear. The man in the redoubts were all pin down. The fighting went on for 2 hours, and the confederates were storming the redoubt in huge numbers. Just when they felt that all hope was lost, One of the union soldiers saw a banner waving from the distance in the mountain..

the banner reads
“Hold the fort; I am coming. W. T. Sher­man.”

The Confederate General French received a false report from his calvary. That a strong Union force is approaching Acworth.. hence he decided to withdrew from the area.

General WT Sherman denied this story, and that his relief troops only arrived to the Allatoona. after the Confederates withdrew. So… how did the banner get there… its still a mystery I guess.

Actually. as I was reading this part of history. I was thinking about.. what is the fort that a Christian is holding to today? Is our battle in life as tough as the time where the redoubt was attacked by the confederates?

This incident reminded me of Shammah,one of the warriors of David (2 Sam 23:11-12). He was in a battle where everyone was fleeing, and he chose to defend the field he was in from the Philistines. And God brought about a huge victory through him.

We now live in a world where all sorts of wickedness seems to be a way of life. Where man are lovers of themselves, lover of money (2 Tim 3:1-5). Because of all the wickedness and lawlessness , the love of many would grow cold. (Matt 24:11-12) . Nowadays, even in office, it is the people who practise imorality, play office politics win, and one by one the people who refuse to follow this tide of the world, get bullied and overworked, many are discouraged, or sacked. This clause even many Christians to fall, and to lose their faith in God.

It is in time like this God would want us to emulate the brave warriors of David, who would stand in the field and to hold the fort. To stand our ground, and continue to be persistent in our faith.

It is at times like this, we have to ask ourselves.. Do we have the strength to continue holding on to the fort of our faith? Or have we decided to open the gates of the fortress, and allow the world to overrun the fort? Can we still see the signal from our God in heaven, telling us to hold the fort, as he is coming soon?

“Be watchful, for the adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion.” (I Pet. 5:8)

With these question in our mind, let us ponder over the lyrics of this hymn.

Title: Hold The Fort
Lyrics: Philip P Bliss

Ho, my comrades! see the signal
Waving in the sky!
Reinforcements now appearing,
Victory is nigh.
*Chorus

See the mighty host advancing,
Satan leading on;
Mighty men around us falling,
Courage almost gone!
*Chorus

See the glorious banner waving!
Hear the trumpet blow!
In our Leader’s name we triumph
Over ev’ry foe.
*Chorus

Fierce and long the battle rages,
But our help is near,
Onward comes our great Commander,
Cheer, my comrades, cheer!
*Chorus

(Chorus)
“Hold the fort, for I am coming,”
Jesus signals still;
Wave the answer back to heaven,
“By Thy grace we will.”

Actually to my brother and sisters who does not read the Chinese hymnbook., This hymn carries a different meaning in Chinese. Hence I am including the Chinese hymn lyrics

Title: 善恶对敌

世间原是两军对敌,即是恶与善;
我必定意属於一边,不能中间站。
shì ​jiān yuán shì​ liǎng jūn duì ​dí​,jí shì è​ yǔ​ shàn​
wǒ bì​ dìng yì​ shǔ wū yī ​biān,bù ​néng zhōng ​jiān zhàn。
*Chorus

我必日日与敌争战,总不敢懈怠;
私欲迷惑,恶俗引诱,魔鬼常相害。
wǒ bì rì ​rì yú​ dí​ zhēng ​zhàn, zǒng bù​ gǎn​ xiè ​dài​ ;
sī ​yù mí ​huo. è​ sú​ yǐn ​yòu​. mó ​guǐ​ cháng​ xiāng hài​
*Chorus

仁义、诚实是我盔甲,圣道是宝剑;
信德是我坚固籐牌,能御魔鬼箭。
rén ​yì​、chéng ​shí shì​ wǒ​ kuī ​jiǎ, shèng dào shì bǎo ​jiàn​;
xìn dé​ shì​ wǒ jiān ​gù​ téng pái, néng yù​ mó​ guǐ jiàn。
*Chorus

从前主耶稣已得胜,主胜,我必胜;
争战完毕,得立主前,荣冕主亲赠。
cóng ​qián zhǔ Yē ​sū yǐ dé ​shèng, zhǔ shèng, wǒ bì shèng;
zhēng ​zhàn wán ​bì​, de​ lì zhǔ qián, róng miǎn zhǔ qīn​ zèng
*Chorus

(Chorus)
我是耶稣基督精兵,必跟随主帅;
敌虽凶恶,靠主权能,百战必百胜。
wǒ shì Yē ​sū​ Jī ​dū jīng​ bīng​, bì gēn ​suí zhǔ shuài;​
dí suī xiōng ​’è​, kào zhǔ ​quán néng, bǎi zhàn bì bǎi ​shèng​

Its Translation is
Title: Confrontation Between Good And Evil

The world is a divided to 2 opposing forces, which
are the forces of good and evil.
I must belong to either side and cannot remain neutral.
*Chorus

I would diligently wage the war daily, never being slothful.
As my desires baffle, my bad habit tempting, and
the devil often tried to bring danger to me.
*Chorus

Benevolence, righteousness and truthfulness are my armour, the
word of God is my sword. Faith is my sturdy shield that
can defend me from the fiery darts of the evil one.
*Chorus

In the past my Lord Jesus lord and has been victorious, like him,
I will be victorious. When the war is over,
we could stand before the Lord and behold his glory.
*Chorus

(Chorus)
I am an elite soldier for Jesus and I would follow my Lords commands
though the enemy may be ferocious, but we could overcome them with
the help of the Lord